The last several months have been a blur of action, trial, error, emotion and a lot of rejoicing. Grayson has gained so many new skills, well I don't know that they are gained or if he has just decided to start using them. That's the thing about my guy... he's just a little stubborn. There has been so much change and so many things happening I just haven't been able to write them all down for fear that they will go away if I share it. Lets talk about the big one. At least the big one for me.
He is calling people by name. For a while now, he has called his brother by name, mostly when he's yelling "GAVIN WESLEY!" because he's made him mad, but the name thing, that we have one and he has one just hadn't ever clicked. He'd never called me mom. Occasionally he would call Brad "Dad", although it was more common for him to yell BRAD at him when he was mad at him :) Wonder where he heard that one... But at first, he started calling his grandma meemaw(however you spell that?) and it was cute and we thought it was fun. He's called my dad papa for a while but very inconsistently. Then he moved on to calling his aunt, Andie by name although he mainly calls her annie, and sometimes Babycakes. Yes, there is a story for that I'll share. But then one day he called me mom. And then he moved on to mommy. It's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. I KNOW that some ASD mommy's will never hear that sound and I don't for a second underestimate how big it is. Even when he's laying in MY bed, eating chicken nuggets and ketchup...again, a story to share... and bellering MOMMY!!! at the top of his lungs because his highness needs a refill on his drink or the Rabbid's need replayed, I don't take it for granted. He calls Brad dad or daddy. He uses our names when he needs us, wants us or just wants some attention. He's called the animals by name for quite some time but it never clicked that people had names before... and then all of a sudden it did. He calls himself Gray or Grayson. I don't know what changed. He's getting older, he's 5 now. We work and work and work at school and therapy but I truly didn't know what we would see, we still don't. But he calls me mommy. And that is more than I could ever say.
Lets go back to him calling himself by name. We are working on and talking a lot about I, me, we, us, etc but he is understanding that he has a name, and how to use it in 3rd person. For example, just because we are being real in this blog, he is still not potty trained. Last night he REFUSED his nighttime diaper because well, the regular diapers have a cooler picture. I'm sick and was honestly too tired to fight it. So he got to wear the stupid, regular diaper. He woke up dry. YAY! I didn't get him changed fast enough. Boo! He sat on the couch this am drinking his cup of milk. All good. He went into the other room to play xbox while I layed on the other end of the couch in the living room attempting to not die. All of a sudden I hear "Mom, Grayson peed." Oh, crap. So I go check out the couch in the other room and it looks good. No pee. Perfect! He is standing by the bathroom and pointing at his rear end. I feel him and it's not too bad but he's in microfleece pj's and they never feel wet. So this crazy mom thinks he needs to go potty and is telling me. SCORE! He refuses that. Not score. So back to the other couch I go while he giggles hysterically. And he keeps giggling and saying Grayson peed. I finally get suspicious and look under the blankie he'd been snuggling in to find a huge wet spot on my nice couch where he had apparently peed much time before this. Mama was mad. It was not funny. But then again, my kid told me he had peed, so that's something, right? Sigh.
The big news at Christmas and his birthday( NYE) was that he loved them. Mostly, the presents. He's never gotten it before. It was a struggle to get him to open maybe one or two. This year, he seemed to understand that they were for him but he had to wait, which was hard, but Christmas was SO fun. He was so happy. He was so exuberant over every present. The weeks leading up to Christmas he would bring me a gift and say "Grayson open present?" I'd say no, not until Christmas. He'd say "Grayson open now?" Sometimes he would bring me one that didn't have his name on it( pretty sure he can read at this point) and I'd say that's not for you, its meemaws. Put it back. To which he would tell me ""Meemaw said ok. Grayson open present". For those of you not keeping track... that's a whole lot of words. 2 sentences really. He's starting to get it. Bit by bit. People have names, he can address people in ways that they will understand. He can put words together for the things he needs. More and more he tells me what he wants me to do instead of showing me.
Most days I'm seeing him be more "grounded" as I call it. He's present. He's in the moment with us. There is more eye contact and interaction. You can give him very specific instructions like pick up the yellow ball that's by the couch and bring it to me and he gets it. He's talking more and more all the time. We went and had a lovely lunch in a restaurant that he truly seemed to enjoy. Grocery shopping is a blast and he has his own shopping list ;). He had occupational therapy last week and his therapist said" Has anything changed at home?" I went oh no. What did he do? But it was quite the opposite. He went on to tell us how he seemed like a different kid from the 2 weeks prior. So engaged and in the moment. I don't know what happened. What changed. I'm just so grateful that it has. That we have more and more moments that are wonderful and less and less of the hard, scary. This morning he was upset because the pants I put on him had a tiny hole in them. He kept fingering it and even after I sewed it closed wouldn't wear them. He won't wear jeans now, only sweats. There are little things. Little quirks I haven't been able to get him to work around but for the most part it's so good. If I would have known a year ago we'd be here today... I don't know what I would have done but I'm so thankful. Every milestone is wonderful for parents but with this journey, even the smallest thing is the biggest victory. We are so lucky to see this progress. There's so much I want to say, I want to share but I think, for now, I'll keep it in small chunks. Keep some of these glories to myself for a while longer. But it's getting better, friends. It really, really is.
